Wednesday, August 5, 2015

One Year Reflections.

Time can be such a funny thing - there are days that drag on and seem like time has to be moving backwards, or at least slowing down considerably. There are days that fly by, and you wonder where the time went. There are moments that end up being defining moments that you wish could last forever.

I can't believe it's been a year (officially) since Anthony and I have been dating. A year doesn't seem like enough time to fully capture what I feel, where I see things headed, how much we've done together, and how much love we have for each other. 

I can remember typing a blog post where I wrote about a breakup I had gone through and how it taught me what I truly want in someone. I think I even listed out the traits that I wanted in my "dream guy," expressing doubt that a thoughtful, handsome, driven, funny man actually existed out there.

Little did I know that on the other side of a double rainbow (Instagram post, but still), that person would be waiting for me. Someone who has encouraged me to speak up when I'm upset, who tells me I'm beautiful, even when I'm sick and am anything but, who from the get go was not afraid to tell me what he wanted or expected from his life and our relationship and once he realized that he wanted me in his life and wanted to be in a relationship, told me so and hasn't stopped telling me since.

Once our relationship started, and I realized how into it I was, I was absolutely terrified - terrified that I'd find out some dark secret that would show me how wrong I'd been, terrified that a switch would flip and Ant would morph into someone insecure or jealous or who was a man slut dating a million people at once and lying about how special he thought I was - but that day never came.

Now, after a year together - a year of vacations, of dates, of moving in and starting a life together, I can't wait to see what else is in store for us.

To my best friend, love of my life, adventure seeker, travel companion, list/Excel maker, planner, and everything else you are to me - thank you. 

Thank you for always being there, for calling me on my bullshit and not letting me hide from how I'm feeling, for making me comfortable to be uncomfortably vulnerable, for making the best grilled cheese sandwiches in the world, for bringing "just because" flowers more often than I can count, for making me laugh all the time, for putting flowers on Poppy's grave when I was in California and wasn't able to... thank you for leaving surprise love notes for me to find when you're gone for the weekend, for allowing me to have peace of mind and trust at all times because of what a genuinely good guy you are, and most of all, thank you for making me believe in true love.

These are some of the memories that I'll be holding onto from this first year.

First sleepover at my (now OUR) apartment meant pancakes in animal and letter shapes (see if you can figure out which one I flipped).

Halloween with Ant's friends, 2014 (I was Medusa, and in case you can't tell, planned my costume exactly two days in advance).

First month anniversary - this was where I realized yet again that I had a keeper, after he planned a date at Alice's Tea Cup on the Upper West, a place that was so completely me.

Bryant Park the first day I met Anthony's parents.

First trip together - we spent the weekend in my old stomping grounds of Philly. Coincidentally, we took this picture in Love Park before even saying "I love you." Also coincidentally, this was the trip that I realized I was in love with Anthony, further concretized when after my college girlfriends and I had too many drinks, he went out to get us Smart Water, Doritos, and other snacks - all without being asked.

Gift from Ant. The thoughtfulness, I cannot.

Free drinks at a Hoboken bar, from when we were helping to create recipes with a bartender we met that night.

My 27th at Press Lounge.

First Valentine's Day.

We had planned to go to a French restaurant for a prix fixe for V-Day. After it snowed 6+ inches in the Catskills, where we were spending the weekend at a B&B, we decided to cancel dinner plans and instead to walk to a pub for takeout food, then walk back (in the blizzard). It showed spontaneity, and we ended up having such a fun, laid back night together - without worrying about navigating windy roads (and limiting wine consumption).

Hoboken snow walks.

Hoboken Biergarten brings out the creep/dancer in us (after multiple drinks).

The bottomless brunch when we decided we wanted to move in together.

Wedding guest champs.

My Maine-r.

Ant's 28th birthday (Pier 13, then back to the Biergarten!).

Best roomie/chef ever.

My heart is full as I write this. I love you, Ant.

*Ant and I will be flying to Sedona, Arizona to celebrate our anniversary (many more to come!). If I'm absentee on your blogs, I will catch up upon our return. Until then, prepare to be flooded with Instagram posts (@littleallygator) of our trip!

xox lovelies, sorry for the photo and mush vomit.


Kizzy Von Doll said...

Ahhh...super beautiful doll, am very very happy for you!! May you always have happiness and love in each other Xxx

Nikki said...

Happy Anniversary! Sedona is GORGEOUS!

Amanda Elizabeth - Meet @ the Barre said...

Awwwwww stop this post just gave me butterflies. So sweet! Happy Anniversary gorgeous!

HiFashion said...

You guys are so cute!! I am so happy for you. It's great to see these pictures of you smiling. (I'm in the opening stages of seeing someone so I hope to stay as happy as you guys are).

B @ The Sequin Notebook said...

Apologies for being so late to see this post, but I loooooved it so much! You guys are such an adorable couple and I feel lucky to have watched how your relationship has grown along the journey. Cheers to this exciting milestone, and many more to come! (PS double date soon?)

Gracey Williams said...

Amazing pictures, I'm glad you're so happy! Alice's Tea Cup looks amazing by the way.

Breakfast at Gracey's

Nicole Eigbrett said...

Landed back at your blog after reading through my own archives--my heart is SO happy for you and Ant! We all have come so far <3 [*insert crying tears of joy emoji*]

So much love to you!

Gretta Hewson said...

Nice blog. I am so inspired by your relationship. You both look so happy with each other. Cheers for the many years of love to come.

Gretta Hewson
Philadelphia Asbestos Lawyer