Friday, February 25, 2011

The Way We Get By.

Okay, so I will admit it: I am one of those terrible, awful people who loved high school. I loved college too, probably more, but high school will always have a special place in my heart.

Since I went to a ridiculously small private school, there really wasn't this huge social divide - everyone had a place where they belonged. You also knew everything about everyone, which was the downfall of it, and trust me, we could have given Laguna Beach a run for their money drama wise. We saw each other through the awkwardness of middle school, dated each other in a Gossip Girl almost incestual way (since we all kind of shared each other - there was no sloppy seconds, it was like, sloppy tenths), and cried when we graduated.

Obviously - we swore we would all be friends forever, no matter what - and obviously, this didn't happen. We all went on our separate ways, to separate states, separate colleges, and we grew up (or at least most of us did, whomp whomp).

We became different things - college drop outs, independent, law school students, parents, teachers, sluts, actresses, husbands/wives, stoners, unemployed post grads... ADULTS - we all changed in one way or another, whether for better or for worse.

There are some people who I graduated with that I really never give a second thought to, people who I wish weren't constantly popping up on my Facebook homepage, the ones I wish I had kept in touch with, but feel that it's too awkward now to randomly write on their wall (isn't it sad that keeping in touch now is really something done primarily on Facebook? Crazy!), and then there are the ones I have kept in touch with - the ones who have grown with me, who remember me as an awkward seventh grader with bad clothes and big glasses, and yet, still love me.

My best friend Tonya and I have been through our ups and downs over the years that we first met as new students at our private school in seventh grade.

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I can totally remember in seventh grade, for whatever reason, she pissed me and the group of girls I hung out with off, and we wrote her a scathing letter telling her what a terrible person she was (awful, I'm so ashamed) -- she handed that note over to a teacher, and everyone who wrote that letter was sentenced to THREE WEEKS of Saturday detentions (no bueno, especially since they literally had us do manual labor like mopping bleachers or sweeping the buses! Lesson learned, administration).

I remember in high school (more sophomore/junior year), we were friends, but weren't close anymore, until our senior class trip to Disney reconnected us, and she joined myself and another girl in our little clique of all boys (making the ratio a much more normal 3 females to about 15 males).

Little baby Allison and Tonya as seniors in high school (on the senior trip that brought us back together as bffs).
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We've been there for each other through it all - bad breakups, good breakups, hook ups, recovering from hangovers, celebrating birthdays, weight loss and gain, fights with family members, girls nights, nights out with the guys, double dates, set ups - you name it, she and I have fought through it, or celebrated it together.

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Tonya and I came up with this (lame, immature) thing that we do whenever one of us has a breakup, or is going through a bad time - we go and try on dresses, the fancier the better.

I cannot even tell you when this started - probably eighth grade, but for some reason, it never ceases to cheer us up. We waltz into a store, try on a ton of dresses, take pictures, make stupid poses, and leave feeling one hundred percent better about ourselves.

Sometimes we end up falling in love with the dresses, and actually buy them, but it usually just results in a lot of laughs.

Plus, it's always nice to have someone besides a salesperson that you don't know to help zip you into a dress, or tell you that you need to suck it in so they can clasp it!

These pictures are literally from three + years ago - I forget which of us was going through what, but a photo lasts a lifetime.

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Since things at home have been a little difficult, and since I went through a (not so difficult) breakup recently, Tonya and I decided that acting like children and reverting back to this tradition was the best possible way to give both of us a boost, and spend time together (though now I have a conscience, and felt bad for the salespeople who helped us, so I spent WAY too much money on a blazer from Neiman Marcus to try to compensate for us wasting their time a little... Sigh, adulthood).

It's also kind of fun to capture all this on film - we've really come a long way. Both of us have grown into ourselves, are more confident and are just happier in general.

While we're both like, actually adults now - with jobs, and new cars, and responsibilities beyond homework, and her maybe getting engaged soon (ah!) - we've grown together rather than have grown apart, which to me, is such a beautiful thing. (Plus, we can still do the same stupid stuff we used to, because sometimes it's fun to act like a kid/teenager again).

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Words cannot even express how heavy this dress was - but that did not stop me from being absolutely in LOVE with it! (I know it's a little bit blurry of a picture - I guess we've lost our MySpace mirror picture skillzzz a little in our old age, bummer).

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Seriously, I'm well aware of how lame this might sound - but to us, it's a great way to laugh and bond and spend quality time together. (And apparently now trying on dresses leaders to the purchase of new blazers, so really, we all win! -- This was especially a win since I did not buy another cardigan).

How do you and your girlfriends bond with each other (or guy friends - I don't gender discriminate!)? Do any of you still keep in touch with high school friends?

Currently listening to: Mumford & Sons - The Cave

20 comments:

Syed said...

Ooh how fun. I wish I could say the same about school, but I've tried to forget as much of it as I possibly can. Let's just say if I never see those people again I will count myself lucky.

Couture Carrie said...

Adorable pics, darling!

xoxox,
CC

Kelly @ The Startup Wife said...

Ha!!! I love this!!!! I love that this is what makes you feel better and is a bonding activity. (Way healthier than my own stress-eating, for sure!) You guys look so cute and I LOVE those dresses. Also, Tonya sounds really smart--if I'd gotten a letter like that in 7th grade I would never have thought to show it to a teacher, ahah!

And I was one of the annoying people who loved high school too.

HiFashion said...

This is so fantastic!!! It's so great to have friends who have been there with you all this time, and that's such a wonderful tradition.
Trying on dresses is a great way to bond and get over a broken heart and I love how you did it now as well.
You both look really amazing in these dresses! I absolutely love the blue one you're wearing.

MizzJ said...

You're so lucky to have such a beautiful friendship in your life! There is something about girl friendships that is so different from guy-girl friendships. I definitely treasure the good female friendships I have as I find them to be rare.

Olive said...

It's such a great thing to have a ritual or a tradition to share with your friend(s). I love that you always make a point to do this dress shopping every time one of you has a romantic upset. It seems like a great way to find closure and build up your friendship, all while helping yourself feel fabulous, which in the photos, you both definitely look it!
Hahahah I know exactly what you mean when you talk about small schools, and sharing everyone, it's insane right? It's awesome that you've been able to keep your friendship with Tonya, even if it started off rocky with that note and Saturday detentions, haha. We were all young once, and we all have our mistakes, and I'd say if she's still trying on dresses with you to this day, she must have forgiven you long ago ;). Senior Disney trip... ♥ I miss mine SO much..
I love all of the pictures, you girls look gorgeous! I love that belted silk floral one from the earlier pictures. That last gold full length one is cool too :).

I still keep in touch with mine because I'm really not too far out of highschool, I'm sure the drifting will increase in the next few years, or when I get farther away from home with my education. Some of my feel-good activities would be going with my best friend Amanda to get cupcakes at our favorite places, which is a 45 minute drive, so it gives us plenty of time to have deep discussions in the car, then top them off with a tasty treat :). Then with my guys, I always feel better after hanging out with everyone in my friend Derek's basement, the "man cave," where we sometimes have kareoke sessions, or watch funny videos, mainly we just talk and laugh and eat his mom's famous nachos.

Have a great weekend Allison!

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Em [The Writer] said...

That's so great that you have a friend like that! Those are definitely some interesting outfits you two tried on! I could try on clothes for hours so I know what you mean when you say it makes you feel better :)

Diego R. Wyatt said...

What an amazing story. I love that you two do some serious fashion therapy post-breakup.

It is crazy to think about the million an done directions everyone from high school has gone, especially when you are not on Facebook (like me : P_ and can't keep track of the juicy updates in people's lives. I am in such a different place and really don't talk to anyone from high school. It was an awesome time of self-discovery though.

PS: Love you in that aqua dress. Gorgeous!

Diego
www.howtozipyourfly.com

Anait said...

This is so funny, but its EXACTLY what a friend and I used to do in college. I'm no longer friends with her (we grew apart) but sometime, when I need a break, I'll go to Macy's and try on the most expensive dresses they have. I once considered going into their bridal section BUT I didn't want to jinx myself :)

It's interesting how relationships come and go....some people are there for a lifetime, some for a certain period of your life.

And that gold dress....awesome! Who can resist a little sparkle?

Claire said...

I had a best friend in high school who i lost touch with for a good few years afterwards..she got married and had kids...i just got married.. lol then she divorced and met someone else and became someone i didn't like so i stopped seeing her. Recently tho we have reconnected and it's good again, we're older wiser and can talk for hours over tea and bacon butties :) x you look like you're having so much fun with the dresses!

LEONID GUREVICH said...

Honey if you loved the school theres something wrong with you :))))))

<3

Leon

Kristin said...

Y'all are adorable...I'm loving the marathon try on sesh...Three cheers for life long friends!

Lee Oliveira said...

Looks like you had a fabulou time to try those gorgeous pieces on and photograph.
The last pic (the lemon and the gold dress are amazing)
lee x

Carol {Everyday Delights} said...

You girls are so cute! Loving the fashion show! Hope your Monday has been amazing!!

la petite fashionista said...

i love this!! it reminds me so much of my girl friends & I! i've stayed close with 4 girls I've known since middle school! I know that the girl friends I have now will be there for me forever; my future bridesmaids, my moral support over stupid guys, & wine drinking companions:)

Sara Louise said...

So silly, I love it!
And 'sloppy tenths'... awesome!

Nicole Linette said...

One of my really close friends in high school and, ashamedly, my 'frenemy' (HA!) always enjoyed trying on dresses in the same way whenever we needed a good cheering up or general inspiration before a big dance. We just grabbed whatever we could that might seem remotely attractive, and I probably have all the pictures as records too :). It's great how girlfriends can have a universal code of bonding.
I hope I can stay tight with my friends into adulthood, it's so unclear at this point.

♥, nicole.

mattposky said...

A lot of my high school and college friends that I maintain contact with have regular (often large) parties our outings. The rest of us do a substantial amount of creative collaboration, mostly in the form of films.

Everyone needs an excuse and reason to get together and stay together. But nobody needs an excuse for being friends.

Good post.

Jenna said...

I loved this post!! So honest, so real, so well-written, SO TRUE. My best friend and I (when we were still best friends... sad situation, long story) used to do something similar for a pick-me-up. We would go into a store and try on the ugliest, most ridiculous outfit we could find. I mean, the more hideous the better. Then, we would try them on and parade around the fitting room looking like death warmed over--because what else can you look like when you're sporting a pepto-pink, sequined, velour tracksuit with a leopard-print hood? Oh, and we would die laughing. Good times! I ADORE THIS POST. And you. Of course, my dear. lol!

xo,
Jenna