Tuesday, December 9, 2008

The Winter Blues

Today was a very blah day.

On a plus, the weather was warmer (maybe in the 40's), which was definitely a nice break!!!

I don't know why I've been in kind of a weird mood lately...I'm SUPER unmotivated (I have studied 0% for my final tomorrow - and I don't even have the energy to study!), and I'm just feeling kind of lonely for some reason.
I think it stems from the fact that all my closest friends have a boyfriend or girlfriend, and I'm always the odd one out. They never purposely make me feel uncomfortable about it, but it's just one of those things. They're all making plans to spend Christmas Eve, or Christmas together and plans for New Years, while I am just...hanging out. I'm part of their lives, but at the same time, I'm the odd one out. I think it's especially tough now, because at my school, EVERYONE gets engaged by the time they're seniors, and here I am with zero prospects, while a ton of my friends are out looking at engagement rings with their significant others.

I get kind of a warped sense of reality being at this school, because I honestly think that all twenty-year-olds in the world are out getting engaged, when really, I think the national average is around 29 or 30. But still, I don't know if I want to be 29 or 30 and still not married, or engaged. And I know there are people out there who aren't supposed to get married, and I really, really hope I'm not one of those people.

I just get so discouraged here, because there is this stupid saying "Ring by spring", meaning, you'll get engaged by spring or something is seriously tres tres wrong with you. I'm now a junior, and haven't even had a boyfriend at this school, so obviously I am a complete and total failure at this stuff.

Ughhh, it's so frustrating. And super, super lonely. Which sucks, especially with all the tv commercials with the happy couples and families.
I think I'm just in a super sucky mood.
Hopefully I'll be over it VERY soon!!
Sorry for the negativity - it's been a recurring theme lately and I do apologize!

P.S. Last night we did our gift exchange at Applebees - C got me a Lacoste headband and R got me this really pretty white shirt from Heritage. R got 2 scarves from me and a really pretty magenta shirt from C. AND, C got 2 scarves from me (red & brown), and a shirt-dress from R! It was very successful, and so much fun.
C wrote like, the sweetest note, it made me super emotional. I'm gonna miss them a lotttt over break!
PLUS, the chef came out and thought we were hot, so he gave R and I extra boneless wings! Yummm.

I hope you are all doing MUCH better than I am today.

Here are pictures from PF Chang's on Sunday :)

Me & C.

The girls!!!


•¦Amy¦• said...

I don't think there are really any rules to finding a boyfriend, or to when you should get engaged.
You should be able to let it come when it's ready, even if that's not until a few years after you've graduated. Don't worry it's coming :]

I know what you mean about the odd one out thing though...I've always been the odd one out in that sort of situation, 'cause I've never really had a real boyfriend. I feel awkward and out of place when I'm hanging out with my friends and their girlfriends/boyfriends. Lol but what's even worse is if you're hanging with them when the significant other isn't around and they can't help but talk about them all the time...

Jocelyn said...

That's rough I'm sorry. I hate being lonely, it's got to be one of the worst emotions to be caught up in. I hope that you'll turn around come winter break, once you see your family and spend time with them!

But please don't get engaged when you're like 20, a bunch of my friends are at BYU and everyone gets married after like their sophomore or junior year... it's ridiculous.

But even though you didn't have any motivation to study, I am sure that you'll do well on your final!

christine said...

that is so crazy that i go to the same school as your brother! i hadn't ever heard of it either, ha but i got recruited for soccer!

i totally understand how you feel about studying, i had the exact same problem.. but i'm sure you'll be fine! i think everyone i probably just burnt out at this point. and emotions are definitely running high, and low. but i agree with jocelyn that everything will get better once we're home and done with school.

and boys just suck. ha i'm sorry being the odd one out isn't fun, and it's no better when they give you a hard time about it.

i love your hair by the way, it's gorgeous!

Glass Mannequin said...

Well, boys are blah. They're dumb when you need them to notice sarcasm and brilliant when you need them to slip up on something.

I'm always here to talk. I'm a great sounding board and I love to try to help people with their problems, so feel free to e-mail me.


Oh, and I think that you are absolutely wrong about one thing.

Everyone has someone for them.

Tom's French Blog - Enjoy ! said...

Hi Allison - it's Tom from France. You posted a kind comment about my blog - thank you. You're gorgeous - I can only assume all the guys in your area are blind .....or dumb.